Sunday, November 4, 2012

Safe Sex

What is the purpose of safe sex?

No babies?

Well that’s part of it, but also there are lots of things one can get from unprotected sex. It can be scary to look into it crabs, syphilis, AIDS, herpes. The list goes on and on. This long list shouldn’t stop you from having a good time, but there are a few guidelines you should follow.

For a start you should get tested to see if you have any stds. You might say to me but I know I don’t have any. It’s better to be safe than to be sorry. You can get std’s without even having any nookie so you should make sure and also encourage your partner to be tested as well. Now you might say oh well that’s all well and good but how can I do that with one night stands. That is when the lessons about forms of contraception comes in, condoms, female condoms, dental dams. these all help prevent getting an std from someone you want to go to town on.

I think that is basic knowledge that most people know, but I have an added recommendation. Practice before you do it with anyone. The largest problem with all forms of sexual protection is not using it properly. 

Practice makes perfect. :) 

Before things get hot and heavy, set ground rules with your partner about what risks you're willing to take and which measures you'll take to protect yourselves and each other.

For some super awesome tips on how to have this talk, take a look at Reid Mihalko’s Safer Sex Elevator Speech

I think everyone knows the basics of condoms, maybe you’re having issues about the size, the lube on them or whether you need to roll them over your balls or not.

Education was sorely lacking within (at least my) public school sex ed class. There’s a whole big world out there of contraception and STI prevention that you may want to consider before you start playing.

There are an estimated 62% of American women ages 15 to 44 currently using some form of contraception. The good news is that birth control is now covered by your insurance as of August 2012 (Although some insurance companies may not allow this to go into effect until January 2013)

The bad news is that the most common form of birth control in the US is sterilization.

Contraception is usually thought of as a relatively new subject, but for centuries humans have created a few effective and a whole lot of very very ineffective methods.

It seems that even in ancient times there was a strong desire to be able to have sex without the worry of children.

The ancient Romans hit pay dirt when they discovered a plant known as Silphium. It was a plant related to fennel that was apparently a very effective birth control as well as being an aphrodisiac.

For 6 centuries they used it to prevent pregnancy and according to many scholars the effectiveness of the herb can be seen in the low birth rate during this time, even though it was a prosperous and peaceful time in which should have resulted in a lot more children. Unfortunately that magical herb was over harvested and went extinct. The Roman’s greedy appetite for care free sex did not stop there.  

Many types of methods were used-- douching with vinegar and/or dipping your penis in vinegar, coitus interruptus (also known as the pull out method) and coitus obstructus (which is a method where pressure is put on the base of the testicle to block the flow of semen) were also common methods used throughout the centuries.

Pig’s intestines were used as an early form of a condom and it was suggested you soak it in warm milk first. Shots of mercury after sex was also supposed to prevent children. (Which it might do, but would also cause brain damage.)

Another method is called a pessary which basically is something to block the cervix. The most popular pessary, made by the ancient Egyptians, was made with an oh so sexy mix of honey and crocodile dung. The Japanese used bamboo tissue paper shoved up there. The Greeks used wool.

Another method used was a sponge with string attached sometimes soaked in something believed to be anti-spermicidal. French ladies of the night used to put half a lemon up there (which gives new meaning to the term sour puss.)

With most of these methods it seems that it was women were trying to take control of their sex life and their body. It seems that for centuries women have been trying to find a way to stop having so many children which would have been a worry for many women when death during childbirth was a very common way to go. 

Unfortunately, except for silphium, none of these methods were 100 percent or even 50 percent effective and many of them were downright dangerous. Also, virtually none of them address the other part of contraception which is to prevent catching an STD (STI).

Luckily after the sexual dark ages of the Victorian era. The modern world improved it's sexual understanding and contraception by leaps and bounds. We now have so many things at our disposal and the problem now becomes which type of contraception to use.

It is a tough and very personal decision which is mix of what you are trying to accomplish and also what feels best and most comfortable to you. Of course as I say time and time again communication is key

Speaking with your partner and your physician will help you find the best type for you.

Come on, Geeks! Get with the times and find yourself a nice modern form of contraception.

Hormonal Methods

These methods of birth control are not going to protect you against STI’s, but they will help prevent pregnancy if used properly. Using a combination of estrogen and progesterone, they work by stopping the egg from being released from the ovary, and by thickening the walls of the cervix so that the sperm don’t want to hang out in the lady bits.

Some protection against:

  • endometrial and ovarian cancers
  • iron deficiency anemia
  • premenstrual symptoms, including headaches and depression
  • bad cramps
  • heavy and/or irregular periods
Some of the most common bad side effects usually clear up after two or three months. They include:

  • bleeding between periods (most often with mini pills)
  • breast tenderness
  • nausea and vomiting

The Pill (and the mini pill)

You know what I mean by The Pill. If you say The Pill in a room full of people they’ll know exactly what pill you mean. (The mini pill is just progesterone and is better for women who smoke,  are prone to blood clots or are over 35.)
The Pill is meant to be taken daily at the same time every day (this is especially true for the mini pill.)

The Patch

The Patch is a small beige strip-- looks a little like a big square Band-aid-- that needs to be changed weekly. The patch may be less effective for women who weigh more than 198 pounds. But it may still be a good option for women of all sizes.  

The Ring

The vaginal ring is a small, flexible ring a woman inserts into her vagina once a month to prevent pregnancy. It is left in place for three weeks and taken out for the remaining week each month.

The Shot

The birth control shot is an injection of a hormone that prevents pregnancy. Each shot prevents pregnancy for three months.


The birth control implant is a thin, flexible plastic implant about the size of a cardboard matchstick. It is inserted under the skin of the upper arm. It protects against pregnancy for up to three years

Emergency Contraception

The "morning after" pill, is not the same as RU-486, a pill that causes an abortion. In fact, if you take Plan B when you're already pregnant—that is, if a fertilized egg has attached to the wall of your uterus—it won't make a bit of difference.

As of April 2009, Plan B is available to women ages 17 and up, nationwide, over the counter without a prescription


An IUD is inserted into the uterus by a healthcare professional and can work as either a barrier or hormonal method-- depending on which brand name you get-- There are two brands of IUD available in the United States — ParaGard (protects against pregnancy for up to 12 years) and Mirena (protects against pregnancy for up to 5 years).

Barrier Methods

This is exactly what it sounds like. Something bars the way for the the various fluids to meet. These methods are much more practical for STI prevention.

Male Condom

Male condoms protect against pregnancy and STDs, including HIV. Worn properly, condoms prevent sperm from entering the uterus. Go with latex or polyurethane condoms; lambskins do not shield you against all STDs.
One condom does not fit all. Luckily condoms come in many shapes, sizes, colors, flavors, textures, and materials, so chances are pretty good that there's a style that fits your needs for comfortable and enjoyable sex.

The Diaphragm & The Cervical Cap

The Diaphragm is made of rubber and shaped like a dome, a diaphragm prevents sperm from fertilizing an egg. It covers the cervix and must always be used with a spermicide. Women must be fitted for a diaphragm in their doctor's office.
The cervical cap is a silicone cup shaped like a sailor's hat. You insert it into your vagina and over your cervix.

Please note: Spermicide must be used!
Spermicide is a birth control method that contains chemicals that stop sperm from moving. Spermicides are available in different forms, including creams, film, foams, gels, and suppositories.
Spermicide can be used alone, or it can be used with other birth control methods to make them more effective. It is always used with the diaphragm and cervical cap.

Female Condom

The female condom is a pouch that is used during intercourse to prevent pregnancy and reduce the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. It has flexible rings at each end. Just before vaginal intercourse, it is inserted deep into the vagina. The ring at the closed end holds the pouch in the vagina. The ring at the open end stays outside the vaginal opening during intercourse. It can also be used for anal sex.
These should not, however, be used in conjunction with male condoms, as friction between the two can cause tears.

Dental Dam

A dental dam is a thin, square piece of rubber which is placed over the labia or anus during oral-vaginal or oral-anal intercourse. Although specially-made rubber dental dams are sold in stores, plastic saran wrap from your kitchen can serve as an effective dental dam as well. A dental dam can help reduce the risk of STD transmission, including herpes, genital warts (HPV) and HIV.


Some of these methods may work for you if you have certain needs, allergies, or just are unable to get the above options for whatever reason


Sterilization is a form of birth control. All sterilization procedures are meant to be permanent.
During a sterilization procedure, a health care provider closes or blocks a woman's fallopian tubes. Closing the tubes can be done in several ways.
One way is by tying and cutting the tubes — this is called tubal ligation. The fallopian tubes also can be sealed using an instrument with an electrical current. They also can be closed with clips, clamps, or rings. Sometimes, a small piece of the tube is removed.
For men this is called a vasectomy. During a vasectomy, the health care provider closes or blocks the tubes that carry sperm. When the tubes are closed, sperm cannot leave a man's body and cause pregnancy.

Fertility Charting

Fertility awareness-based methods (FAMs) are ways to track ovulation — the release of an egg — in order to prevent pregnancy. Some people call FAMs "natural family planning." 
Twenty-four out of every 100 couples who use fertility awareness-based methods each year will have a pregnancy if they don't always use the method correctly or consistently. Always practicing these methods correctly will make them more effective.


A man who uses withdrawal will pull his penis out of the vagina before ejaculation — the moment when semen spurts out of his penis. Withdrawal is also known as coitus interruptus and the pull out method.
Withdrawal may be the world's oldest way to practice birth control. About 35 million couples worldwide rely on withdrawal.

Like all birth control methods, the pull out method is much more effective when you do it correctly.

  • Of every 100 women whose partners use withdrawal, 4 will become pregnant each year if they always do it correctly.
  • Of every 100 women whose partners use withdrawal, 27 will become pregnant each year if they don't always do it correctly.

Couples who have great self-control, experience, and trust may use the pull out method more effectively. Men who use the pull out method must be able to know when they are reaching the point in sexual excitement when ejaculation can no longer be stopped or postponed. If you cannot predict this moment accurately, withdrawal will not be as effective.
Even if a man pulls out in time, pregnancy can still happen. Some experts believe that pre-ejaculate, or pre-cum, can pick up enough sperm left in the urethra from a previous ejaculation to cause pregnancy. If a man urinates between ejaculations before having sex again, it will help clear the urethra of sperm and may increase the effectiveness of withdrawal.    


Outercourse means different things to different people. For some people, outercourse is any sex play without vaginal intercourse. For others, it is sex play with no penetration at all — oral, anal, or vaginal.

Make sure to check out Planned Parenthood for more information.

It doesn’t have to be clinical it can be fun and lighthearted. A trip to the condom aisle at the pharmacy can be sexy. You should never be ashamed of going. You should own it. Isn’t getting laid something you should be bragging about?

                                           -- Kinky Kraken & Samus Andress


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